The disorder I’m struggling with right now is PTSD. It’s the most complexed mental disorder which occurs when someone goes through a traumatic incident. It comes with flashbacks, re-experiencing the event again and again in the mind. It also brings depression, eating disorder, anxiety, and bipolar disorders alongwith it.
Being a psychology student myself I have studied about it and I must say it’s damn interesting and at the same time extremely scary. You never know how the patient will react if something triggers the vulnerable side of his/her brain. The only way I calm myself during those situations is through breathing in & out and obviously crying. Letting all your emotions out through tears is the best cure ever. Trust me on this!
I have tried soothing my pain through different medium as well. For instant, I started drinking, and whenever I’d get high I ended up crying for no reason. Then I realised it’s not helping me, at all, it’s making me more weak. Am not weak. I stopped drinking the same year I started it.
I went to one storytelling event where for the first time I opened up… I narrated my story to the strangers sitting in the audience. I was shivering before going on stage, but somebody suggested me that it’d be the most liberating experience ever. I did not cry, but the audience was in tears. That’s when I realised the things I have been through in life are not ordinary and it doesn’t happen with everyone. It must have happened with me for a reason. The reason which even I don’t know, nor I want to know.
One of the girl among them texted me, “you’re a real gem. Keep inspiring us with your spirit.” I have received such compliments before too. When people actually come up and say that they look up to me when they are going through something tough in their life. Especially, when they see me laughing like a maniac over a stupid joke just after sharing my story.
The guys tell me that I intimidate them and they are afraid of talking to me. That’s really funny and probably that’s the reason why I’m still single. One of the guy told me, “it’s beautiful how you pen down your pain in a piece of paper.” I feel my pain so that it won’t eat me out from inside. I don’t want to fall back in the darkness where I was once. It took me 7 years to come out of it. I’m not completely healed, but trying to be the best version of myself.
Sharing your painful story with others will not just heal you, but it will also be the ray of hope in someone else’s life. You never know what the other person is going through, so be the light in someone’s life and make their life a little better just by sharing a part of your life with them.